God's seal of approval

09:19 faithful , friends , love , marriage 1 Comments

I met my wife while serving as a missionary aboard an OM Ship. Her first words to me were: "I don't know who you are, but I want you to never talk to me again.".


The way that Operation Mobilisation structures it's volunteer program, requires you to join for two years at a time. As I was joining the MV Doulos, my wife was in the last six months of her commitment, but after our unpromising first meeting, we both realized that, as far as these things go, we were destined for each other. The first few weeks after we met each other, we stayed up late at night, fervently discussing personal philosophies, faith and life goals. It was quite strange, but it felt like we had a lot of catching up to do, and even though our initial intentions were not to start a relationship, our first encounters were marked by a sense of urgency that neither of us had planned. We discussed things like life goals, desire for children, parenting goals, personal issues of faith and much more besides.

After a few weeks, we both realized what was happening, and I made my intentions clear. Due to the nature of the ministry we were involved in at the time, the personnel department on board suggested that we take some time of isolation from each other, in order to seek God's will and to make sure that it was not simply a passing fancy. As it goes with these things, our isolation merely served to increase our affection, and by the time our required separation ended, I was just about ready to propose.

Now, since we were both serving as missionaries at the time, money was tight. We each received about 20 euros pocket money per month, which meant that my proposal was not going to be a very memorable event, even though I wanted to make it a special night for my wife-to-be, I barely had enough money to to make a passable picnic.

I had phoned my parents to tell them that I had found myself a good lady wife, and they were so excited, and surprised that they offered to provide me with an engagement ring. Together, my mother and my grandmother took their engagement and wedding bands respectively, and had them made into a new ring for me. My father, being a very practical kind of guy, took the ring and popped it into an empty CD case, and mailed it to some family friends living in a port city that we would soon be visiting. By the grace of God the package made it safely to it's destination, and when I received it I was overwhelmed by how generous my mother and grandmother had been, for the sacrifice they had made to provide the ring.

Now, it came time for me to plan the proposal. We were in Wellington, New Zealand at the time, which is a beautiful city with very nice public parks, so I thought a nice picnic in a park would be the perfect place to have a romantic picnic, where I could propose.

About two weeks before the planned proposal, I had to go to the airport to collect a friend who was returning to the ship after a brief furlough. He had gone home to visit with his family, and to work on his financial support shortfall. At the airport I found a USB memory key that someone had lost. At the time these were still quite expensive, so I quietly celebrated my good fortune in finding one abandoned. As I returned to my cabin on the ship, I thought, maybe I can identify the owner of the memory stick my it's contents, and try to contact him to return it. I found the stick was filled with what seemed like legal documents, so I made an effort to find contact details. One email address was repeated in many documents, so I sent an email in the hope that it was the right one.

A day or so later, I received a telephone call from a relieved gentleman who had lost the memory stick at the airport. When I told him that I was serving on the Doulos, he said that both he and his wife had been planning to visit the ship, so I invited them to come for a tour. The ship was, at the time, the oldest active passenger ship in the world, so we had quite a number of people who were keen to visit. The owner of the memory stick, Jonathan, also turned out to be an avid photographer, so I was quite glad to give him a tour of this floating piece of history.

I did not know this at the time, but Jonathan and his wife were very active members of their church, so when they came onboard one evening for the tour, we had such a nice time together, that they invited me and my soon to be fiance, Ellie, to join them at their next cell group meeting. As we got to know them better, we became fairly good friends. We were going to be in Wellington for some time, so we not only joined them for cell group, but also for a games night, and Ellie even joined them for church.

One of the evenings that we were invited to join them for cell group, Ellie had to work, so I went on my own. At the end of the meeting, the members of the cell group asked me if I had any prayer requests, and I confided in them that I would soon be proposing to Ellie. Immediately they overwhelmed me with prayers of blessing and encouragement. By the end of the meeting, they were more excited about it than I was. They asked me if I had a plan in mind for how I was going to propose, so I explained to them that, with the means I had available, I could only manage a picnic in the park. The entire group, immediately and without even having to discuss it, assured me that they would plan the night on my behalf.  Their response almost made me cry, it was so spontaneous and sincere, that I immediately knew that while it came through them, it was FROM God.

When the night of the proposal finally came, I had simply told Ellie that she should dress up since I was taking her out. I was fairly sure that she knew what was going on, since I am not very good at keeping secrets. Her friends (who were in on it) made sure that her hair was done and she looke absolutely beautiful.

At around 7pm both Ellie and I were called on the ship's paging system, to report to the quayside. We got there to find a luxury chauffeur driven car waiting to take us to a beautiful and romantic French restaurant and winery. Neither of us had been driven around in such style before, so we were absolutely thrilled. When we arrived at the restaurant, a waiter greeted us with a beautiful bouquet of roses, along with a card signed by every member of Jonathan's cell group. I have to confess that I remember little of the meal that we had, I was so nervous. But, appropriately, after the main course, I got down on one knee, and asked Ellie to marry me. She cried a little, I may or may not have cried, but she did say yes.

We finished our meal in an almost euphoric state, and when we had had our dessert, the waiter appeared to tell us that our car was waiting. The driver proceeded to take us to Jonathan's home, which was situated against a hill overlooking the Wellington harbour. Once there, Jonathan had prepared to have an engagement photo shoot with us. Neither Ellie nor me, are very keen on being photographed, but it is so nice to have such a beautiful record of that evening. After the photos were done, we were taken outside, where a Jacuzzi awaited us. They had arranged with our friends from the ship, so our bathing costumes were already laid out for us, and on the side a glass of champagne for each of us.

We ended the evening in a hot-tub overlooking the Wellington harbour, not only having had a wonderful evening, but also a unquestionable message from God that He had brought us together.

There is a simple lesson to learn, while I don't believe God is obligated to reward good behavior, I do believe that He cares about His faithful. Because I was faithful in returning something as insignificant as a memory stick, and because Jonathan, his wife, and the members of their cell group were faithful with the things God had given them, God was able to unequivocally show that it is His will that Eleanor and I are together. I for one cannot put down to chance the series of events that culminated in our engagement. And now, more than 8 years down the line, I am still just as sure that our union is exactly what God had planned for us.